Performance Piece. 2021.
Hair carries a multitude of meanings, serving as both a physical and emotional extension of ourselves. These fibers growing from our scalp can embody resilience, struggle, growth, and healing, with each transformation symbolizing shifts within us. For me, my hair became a mirror of a prolonged period of struggle—a time when anxiety, depression, and loss felt woven into each strand. Every inch that grew seemed to absorb the weight of my emotional journey, holding onto the mental burdens I felt trapped within.
To release these emotions, I engaged in a personal ritual, infusing each strand with the symbolic weight of my experiences. I wrote words that reflected my inner turmoil—adjectives that had defined my thoughts—onto stones, placing them in a pouch that I would carry throughout the ritual. I braided my hair, threading each section with silk fabric, an ornamentation that mirrored the way I composed myself for others, masking my inner pain with an external calm. Each stitch felt like a step toward mending my path to inner peace, as I wove fabric and meaning together.
At the end of each braid, I tied the stones, one by one, making each stitch and movement increasingly challenging, mirroring the growing burden I had carried over the years. The ritual reached a climactic moment as I cut the braids, severing the weight I had internalized. The sound of stones falling to the ground became a poignant auditory release, each thud embodying the gradual shedding of pain.
A tri-fold mirror surrounded me during the performance, reflecting my image from multiple angles, a fragmented representation of my inner self. The warped reflections mirrored the distortion of my own perception, as I confronted layers of myself through this journey. The cut strands of hair scattered across a silk cloth, a visual depiction of the chaotic, cathartic release, like abstract brushstrokes on a canvas.
This was an intimate experience, meant for solitude. Inward reflection was essential; I needed to rely on my own thoughts rather than those of others. When it was over, a strange mix of freedom, vulnerability, and renewal washed over me, marking a moment of release and the hope of something new.
Handwoven tapestry from painted canvas and yarn. 2021.
